By Alyssa Schnugg
News editor
alyssa.schnugg@hottytoddy.com
While taking care of her mother who had Alzheimer’s, Donna Toole found solace among a group of people who were going through the same things and who understood the day-to-day frustrations as well as the small moments of joy.
For 35 years the Alzheimer’s and Related Disorders Support Group has provided a place where families with a loved one living with dementia can go to seek support, share their frustrations and learn from each other about what resources are available to them in Oxford.
“It helped to kind of know what to expect, how things progress, and to know that what is going on isn’t just happening to you but other people as well,” Toole said. “And we learn a lot by hearing about other people’s experiences and how they deal with things.”
Toole’s mother died in 2014; however, Toole said she continued to go to the support group for about a year after and still tries to stop in now and then.
“I go to share my experiences now and to tell people in the group how helpful the group was for me,” she said.
The group was started by Jo Ann O’Quin, professor emerita of social work at the University of Mississippi when she was teaching a graduate course in 1985. The course, “Psychological Aspects of Aging,” led her and her students to conduct research and to hold a community forum at the Lafayette County and Oxford Public Library.
“That’s when the support group was birthed and formally started with a meeting a couple of months later,” O’Quin said. “We have been meeting monthly since that time … We have been told that we may be the longest continuous Alzheimer’s group in the nation, as many start and stop over the years.”
The group is for those caring for a loved one with memory loss — whether true Alzheimer’s or a related dementia. It’s for primary caregivers, daughters, sons, daughters and sons-in-law, husbands, wives and friends and other family members.
Earlier this month, O’Quin held a Caregiver Appreciation Night at The Blake to commemorate the 35th anniversary of the support group.
“It was a night to celebrate caregivers and also to bring awareness to the community that we still need support and resources,” O’Quin said.
Photo provided by Kathy Van Cleave.
During the affair, O’Quin received a surprise when she was presented with a certificate of appreciation by The MIND Center at the University of Mississippi Medical Center.
The MIND Center is a national leader in Alzheimer’s and dementia research and offers diagnosis and treatment for patients with memory loss and cognitive impairment.
“Navigating Alzheimer’s disease and other dementias can be a stressful, bewildering journey for families and caregivers,” said Denise Lafferty, chief strategy and operations officer at The MIND Center. “The impact of the Oxford caregiver support group over its 35 years in service in providing a safe environment for family caregivers to share their experiences, discuss issues, gain knowledge about the disease process, learn about resources, and support one another, cannot be overstated and we are proud to recognize their contributions.”
The success story of the support group also includes the current and ongoing programs that were birthed from O’Quin’s original group such as the Caring for Aging Relatives Effectively education and support group that meets monthly. The C.A.R.E. lunch meeting is for anyone caring for an aging adult regardless of the reason or medical condition.
More than 10 years ago, Bill and Dianne Arnold attended the support group after moving to Oxford. Dianne was working with the Department of Mental Health’s Alzheimer’s division and had run a longtime support group in Cleveland, where she also started a respite program after caring for her own father who had dementia.
“One night after a particularly emotional group meeting with several adult children caring for their parents 24 hours a day while balancing their work and other responsibilities, Bill said ‘we have to start a respite day program,’” O’Quin said. “I had tried to promote day services for years and had limited success, so this was a blessing and I eagerly worked with this remarkable couple to find funding.”
They secured a small grant from the city of Oxford after meeting with then-Mayor Pat Patterson and First Presbyterian Church offered a room to use.
Memory Makers was officially launched in 2010.
Over the past 10 years, Memory Makers has grown significantly and has moved a few times since those early days at First Presbyterian. It recently moved to 106 Skyline Dr. to a larger facility.
“We have doubled the number of participants over the last year,” said Memory Makers Director Tracy Morgan.
The program is held from 10 a.m. to 2 p.m., Monday through Fridays, and includes breakfast snacks and lunch.
The cost is just $25 a day; however, several scholarships are available for those unable to afford the payment.
“Nobody is turned away for not being able to pay,” Morgan said.
Each morning, participants arrive at a festive setting, with flowers, colorful plates, napkins and decorations with healthy snacks readily available. Those attending the program participate in exercise, art, brain-stretching activities and music.
A nonprofit organization, Memory Makers relies on volunteers from the public and funding from the city, Lafayette County, state grants, fundraisers and donations from the public.
Inside Memory Makers is the Caregiver Resource Center where caregivers can receive information on local resources, living options, home-care services, Hospice, and receive family counseling and information on dementia.
“Will St. Amand, who was an original member of the support group and continues to attend, has purchased copies of, “The 36-Hour Day” by Mace and Rabins, a valuable resource to loan to caregivers dealing with dementia issues,” O’Quin said. “He also is responsible for the placement of the fabulous sculpture ‘Bardo of Rose’ at the University Museum created by Roy Tamboli in honor of his father who had dementia and his mother, Rose, a wonderful caregiver.”
However, more needs to be done in Oxford for aging adults, O’Quin said.
“We are so fortunate to have the state veterans’ home, three assisted living communities, and numerous home care and hospice services,” O’Quin said. “Although some communities have adult day care programs, Memory Makers is one of only a handful of respite programs in the state and we were developed by the DMH to serve as a model for others.”
However, there’s always more that can be done to provide help to Alzheimer’s patients and their families, she said. Oxford has yet to have a Geriatrician – a board-certified doctor to work in geriatrics or geriatric-psychiatric inpatient care.
“We also continue to need affordable housing alternatives and in-home care, and it dismays me when I see we have a waiting list for those who need Meals on Wheels and in-home respite care in our community.”
In the meantime, the Alzheimer’s and Related Disorders Support Group, C.A.R.E., Memory Makers and the Caregiver Resource Center continue to provide information, resources and hope to caregivers in Oxford.
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