Oxford Stories: How I Fell in Love in College

I tried not to, but I blinked. Before coming to Oxford, I recall wondering what my upcoming college experience would be like, who my friends would be, how I would fit my life into a shoebox dorm room and, mostly, if I would fall in love.

Fast forward four years of fun and laughter, lessons and experiences. I have a week left, and I am holding onto every last moment here. I’m going on countless “ride alongs,” as my friends call them, around the Square and through campus listening to our favorite songs, just trying to soak in the beauty of this place as much as possible.

Maggie Durnien

I find myself lingering after classes to talk with my professors and absorb as much of their knowledge before they will no longer be only a classroom away. I find myself looking back and going over the “remember whens” and avoiding the “so what’s next?” in conversations.

I first met Ole Miss visiting with my older sister, Molly. My sister wanted to go to a Southern school. Being from St. Louis, Ole Miss was only five hours away and was highly recommended by a family friend. I had a soccer tournament in Memphis. After I finished playing, we visited the campus.

My first impression was pulling up to Martindale, seeing the observatory next door and thinking how cool it is that college students can gaze at the stars in a real observatory. The five of us, who knew nothing about Ole Miss, hopped out of the car and walked around campus. Before we knew it, we were in the Lyceum, and shortly after, receiving a personal tour of the campus from the chancellor himself. I thought we were so lucky to get this special tour. I didn’t know it then, but now I know that’s really just Ole Miss for you.

My sister was all smiles and there wasn’t a bad thing we could say about the place. After a trip to the bookstore, Molly had bought an Ole Miss sweatshirt. When she wore it to school that Monday, I knew she was going to be a Rebel.

Molly began college at Ole Miss, and I started high school. I visited Molly with my family for football weekends. Like it always does to newcomers, the Grove proved to be the most amazing thing my family had ever seen. Before long, my dad found an excuse to make it down to Oxford for every home game and, like a lot of love stories start out, me and Ole Miss became friends.

After four years of Molly’s incredible Ole Miss experience, it was time for me to choose a college. Being the indecisive person I am, I found it difficult. Truth is, I loved all the colleges I visited, and I had a sick satisfaction making my parents sweat by not choosing Ole Miss right away.

I visited colleges and ranked them in my head comparing them Ole Miss. After months of visits and ranking colleges based on if they had a postcard perfect Square like Oxford, and if they had a unique tailgating experience like the Grove, my time was running out, and I realized that no other school had the charm of Oxford or the game day Grove experience. In fact, most just tailgated in parking lots, and that wasn’t going to work for me.

Yet, with all these realizations that Ole Miss and Oxford really do have it all, I still wanted to be different than Molly and carve my own path. I was stuck on Indiana University. I even told people I was going there.

Then, my sister sent me a care package, (even though she was the college student in the situation). I knew she was up to something. It was a package filled with Ole Miss things, a pom-pon, a T-shirt, a poster, and a picture in a Rebel red and blue frame with a photo of me and Molly.

In the picture, we are smiling from ear to ear holding each other tightly. I remember thinking at that moment, that perhaps carving my own trail wouldn’t nearly be as special as sharing Ole Miss with my sister.

She came home for Easter and showed me a YouTube video of the beer showers in right field to show me how fun Ole Miss was in the spring as a final ploy to get me to make up my mind and go to Ole Miss. With my whole family crowded around the computer laughing at the footage, asking Molly about right field, I leaned over to my mom, grabbed her arm and said, “I want to go to Ole Miss.”

With that, all hell broke loose in my kitchen. My mom literally screamed with joy. My dad let out a sigh of relief. (I know he was thanking God for another four years in the Grove.) Molly was ecstatic and started telling me all the things she could help me with, and my brother was probably Googling his next Ole Miss bookstore purchase.

That’s how I met Ole Miss and, now, like Molly, I have my own four years to cherish. Oh, do I cherish them.

It’s funny to think back to all the questions I had before arriving here and how the answers played out during my time at Ole Miss. To answer a few I mentioned earlier: Yes, I found friends here. Friends that turned into family. Friends that I have made memories as good as gold with. Friends that I will have forever.

Yes, I did fit my life into a shoebox dorm, and even though I now live in a house off the Square, there is nothing like living on a floor with all of your friends just steps away. I’ll miss there never being a dull moment ever like it is living with your friends.

And the last one: Will I fall in love? Yes. I did fall in love. No it wasn’t with an Ole Miss boy like I previously would have hoped. I fell in love with Ole Miss and the feeling that comes with it. I fell in love with the people here, the beauty of the campus, the charm of Oxford and the feeling of peace I have walking back to my car after class, just being happy because I love this place so much.

What started out as a friendship introduced by my sister turned to a like. Now, right as I am about to leave, I can confidently say I am in love with this place. I don’t know from personal experience, but like all good loves stories, real love teaches you something about yourself.

Ole Miss has taught me valuable lessons I will carry with me forever – lessons inside the classroom and out. The education I have received has pushed me beyond my comfort zone, and my teachers have been there every step of the way reassuring me. Ole Miss has taught me I can accomplish whatever I decide to do in life.

I even have loved Ole Miss through its flaws. Again, like all good and real love stories, there are times of difficulty. I love Ole Miss even though commuter parking sometimes becomes a real life version of “The Hunger Games,” and I love Ole Miss even when things happened here that made me sad.

I got through these tough times by finding the good in the way Ole Miss handled these situations, by always doing the right thing and by being the first to admit it was wrong.

So yes, I’ll walk away at graduation, and it will feel like a breakup in a way. My time as a student will be done. I won’t binge on Ben and Jerry’s ice cream, but I’ll definitely ugly cry at some point.

I’ll miss the feeling of trashcan Friday, bumping into friends on the way to class and making plans right there on the spot. I’ll miss meeting new people in my classes and the feeling of relief when a professor emails you that class is cancelled.

I’ll miss so many things, but most of all, I’ll miss being a student and being in tune to everything that is going on here. I’m already way too jealous of all the spring campus tours I have seen. It makes me want to do it all over again, and I would.

Lastly, in reflection of my Ole Miss love story, I believe real love truly makes you want to be a better person, and Ole Miss not only made me a better person, but also makes me want to go out into the world and be even better and make them proud. I don’t know exactly what is ahead for me, but I know I will carry and credit Ole Miss always.

I know you never graduate from Ole Miss, and that brings me great relief. Until I return back here, I’ll be looking for excuses to talk about it, saying Hotty Toddy to random strangers I pass with Ole Miss hats on and planning trips back with my friends, who will be scattered throughout the country. (I already know I’m going to the Georgia game next year. HYDR!).

My love for Ole Miss is as special as the place itself. If distance really does make the heart grow fonder, I know we will make it through this soon-to-be long distance relationship because my heart will always be here in Oxford, Mississippi.

Maggie Durnien can be reached at mkdurnie@go.olemiss.edu. Read her work on Oxford Stories Longform.

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