‘Windows’ by Shane Brown

I’ve always heard the saying that one door closes and one door opens.

I believe that. But, what about the window you stare out every day? Nobody ever talks about a window. I always look out a window. I don’t tend to worry about a door opening because I know they revolve. I’ve had plenty of doors open and shut and I haven’t stopped. I keep going on and I look out my window…

I’ve opened several windows. Some windows I wished I’ve never opened. But it’s too late for wishing. Too late for the window as a coach, a teacher, a salesman, a hard worker and sometimes a farmer. I’ve opened windows of lust, trust, forgiveness, and denial. It’s been too late for you as a secretary, a lawyer, a doctor or a preacher. The window is opened and you just stare. It can be a beautiful view and thoughts could dance and spin around. But, not unless you know what you want. Not unless that window is open for you: something you want and need. Something that makes your day at ease.

I look out my window most days and it’s clear. I know where I am going and I know what I am doing. The world is beautiful to me and my thoughts are sharp and continuous. I roll through the day and my window and it seems in my mind nothing can stop me. My window is full of smiles and laughter and work. It is prideful. It also wraps a big circle around the ones I love and who loves me.

I’m looking out the window as I drive through Tula and the sun is fading below tree lines west of me. The sky is pink and purple and the sun’s bright glare closes my day and my window. Today was a great day and I hope my window shows that tomorrow too.

But I know there will be days that my window is dark and hazy. There will always be days like that. But I know how to roll my window up and I know how to move on. I also know that I only have to look out that window for just one day and hope the window is clear the next.

I can pass through those days of trial and error; days of mistakes and hurt and pain that has built up inside of me. Sometimes it’s okay for me to have those days. They remind me of my journey and the road of my learnings. Those are the things that build me, that push me, that motivate me during my clear days.

It’s the moment I look out my clear window and a cool morning’s breeze rushes over my body as the sun is coming up and chills run from my neck to my back and down my arms. That feeling to me is a feeling of greatness and the sun has cast a light for my path as I look out my window. I know greatness is out there and I will find it. My window has already promised it to me.

Shane Brown is a HottyToddy.com contributor and the son of noted author Larry Brown. Shane is an Oxford native with Yocona and Tula roots. Shane is a graduate of Mississippi State University and works as a salesman for Best Chance. He has two children — Maddux, age 9, and Rilee, age 7 — and makes his home at “A Place Called Tula.” He can be reached at msushanebrown@yahoo.com.

Copyright Shane Brown, 2015.